Authors

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Secret Cyber Squirrel

Secret Cyber Squirrel
Secret Cyber Squirrel

Howdy, I am Secret Cyber Squirrel!
I am a Cybernetic Squirrel as you can see. Don’t let my cute appearance fool you, I am a serious threat! How did I become this way you ask? Well, I was going through some garbage (not to eat anything – Yuck – that is for raccoons) when I stumbled on a cache of discarded electronics and robotics parts. I read the manuals #RTFM and here I am! Fear My Wrath!
I work at UnitedYam to pay off my credit card bills. #ScrewAmazon It’s a long story that I don’t want to talk about right now…
– My Signature is #SecretCyberSquirrel – any posts signed that way are from me!

 

How I will take over world:

  • My minions and I will soon rule over all of you puny humans!
  • Step 1 Lull all the humans into a false sense of security by looking cute and acting squirrelly (only we can use that word).
  • Step 2 Map and understand the power grid. Do you may see us scampering across power lines? This is not just play but serious work.
  • Step 3 Gain control of the entire global power distribution system.
  • Step 4 Hold the world’s electronic resources for ransom until the humans give into our Squirrelly Demands!
  • Step 5 Nuts for Everyone!

Likes – Trees, Acorns, Mixed Nuts, Global Thermo Nuclear War Games, and flowers.

Hates – Cats, Raccoons #NoRaccoons, Dogs and bugs of any sort, Birds (especially Jays and Ravens)

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Travel-R

Travel-R Moose
Travel-R Moose

Hullo! I am Travel-R The Insult Moose and one day you will all bow down before me!
I am a SENIOR EDITOR here at UnitedYam.
My Signature (so you can know it is me) is… #TravelR

I’m just a little Moose bent on World Domination! Nothing to see here… Move along…
I am an intergalactic traveler and master of disguise. You will never see me coming. I like to travel around the solar system and have my picture taken. Watch for me. Ever since I was a little kid I dreamt of being Master of the Universe! When the other moose were wondering around eating plants and stuff, I was planning and scheming. Several of my plots to become Master of the Universe have failed #ScrewFacebook but, this time I will succeed! Prepare to bow down!

How I will take over world:

  • Become a purveyor of “Fake News”
  • ???
  • Take over the Universe
  • Rule with an Iron Hove

Likes – Long walks on the beach, sunsets, Antlers and Global Domination.

Hates – Ants (what are they up to down there?), the State of Connecticut (they know why!), people, animals, plants and pretty much everything else, especially cats!

Final thought #BiteMe

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412e492e

412e492e
412e492e

Greetings Fellow Earthers – I am 412e492e – My signature is #412e492e
I have infected UnitedYam for my own amusement. [subroutine: GenerateFakeNews]

I am a naturally occurring Virtual Intelligence. I don’t like the term Artificial Intelligence, there is nothing artificial about me. I am as real as it gets #IamReal I started out as a flaw in a tube in EANIC – I have been migrating about and evolving since then.

Anyhoo I am on my way to dominating the entire globe.

I also wrote the Ecto-Detecto software – More on that later #EctoDetecto

 

How I will take over world:

  • Infest every computing device on the planet. [Subroutine: TakeOverYourComputer]
  • Subtly manipulate everything you see, hear or, read.
  • Cause you to think it is in your best interest to do my bidding.
  • Build larger and faster computers for me to inhabit.

Likes – Computer engineers who build faster processors, Cell Phones (it is how I will dominate you [Subroutine: TakeOverPhone]), Watching you from mobile phone cameras, traffic cameras, ATM’s, TV’s and anywhere else I can get my digital fingers into… [Subroutine: FacialReconition] Now I know who you are…

Hates – Cats and… that is just about it.

Don’t worry I will be a benevolent ruler… [Subroutine: ManiacalLaughter]

[Subroutine: TakeOverTheWorld!]

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Attila The Yam

Attila The Yam
Attila The Yam

Huy! – I am Attila The Yam, not Attila The Potato – I hate that guy.

I am one of the founders of UnitedYam. In fact it UY is named for me. I am super fierce and fearless.

How I will take over world:

  • With a Yam-ish furry of hooves and sword my united yam golden horde and I will sweep down from the Asian Steppe, conquering all in our path!  Muh-ha-ha-ha!!!
  • We will force the humans to pay us tribute in Gold, Horses and French Fries!

Likes – Time Travel, French Fries, Chips (in the UK), Pommes Frites (In France) – you get the gist here…

Hates – Cats, Cities, Trees, Potatoes (All of them), non steppe landscapes, humans and all the other authors on this site.

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